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Remarkable Obituary
Remarkable Obituary

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Mr. Common Sense. Mr. Sense had been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that life isn't always fair. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge).

His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place- Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Mr. Sense declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student; but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a bit in her lap, and was awarded a huge financial settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust, his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

If you still remember him, pass this on; if not, join the majority and do nothing.
Post By (v)orpheus
Nov 30, 2006, 4:49pm

Hmm new topic
hmm good topic for Wusa.... I have no idea, so this could take a bit to think of something to spark a convo

Yea i got nothing, maybe you can start something??

Any good new video games out there right now or something that is coming out for the PC??? Team Fortress II, Did that get squashed or what?? Anyone have any info on that, I thought i remember haering that being released like 3 or 4 years ago back when I played TFC... and I think i remember seeing something recent about it but dont remember what.
Post By CheckMate
Nov 30, 2006, 11:08am

Not sure if this is true
Not sure if this is true, but it should be -


Sheriff Joe Arpaio (in Arizona ) who created the "tent city jail":

He has jail meals down to 40 cents a serving and charges the inmates
for them.

He stopped smoking and porno magazines in the jails. Took away their
weights. Cut off all but "G" movies.

He started chain gangs so the inmates could do free work on county and
city projects.

Then he started chain gangs for women so he wouldn't get sued for

He took away cable TV until he found out there was a federal court
order that required cable TV for jails. So he hooked up the cable TV
again only let in the Disney channel and the weather channel.

When asked why the weather channel he replied, so they will know how
hot it's gonna be while they are working on my chain gangs.

He cut off coffee since it has zero nutritional value.

When the inmates complained, he told them, "This isn't the
Ritz/Carlton. If you don't like it, don't come back."

He bought Newt Gingrich' lecture series on videotape that he pipes into
the jails.

When asked by a reporter if he had any lecture series by a Democrat, he
replied that a democratic lecture series might explain why a lot of the
inmates were in his jails in the first place.

More on the Arizona Sheriff:

With temperatures being even hotter than usual in Phoenix (116 degrees
just set a new record), the Associated Press reports: About 2,000
inmates living in a barbed-wire-surrounded tent encampment at the
Maricopa County Jail have been given permission to strip down to their
government-issued pink boxer shorts.

On Wednesday, hundreds of men wearing boxers were either curled up on
their bunk beds or chatted in the tents, which reached 138 degrees
inside the week before.

Many were also swathed in wet, pink towels as sweat collected on their
chests and dripped down to their pink socks.

"It feels like we are in a furnace," said James Zanzot, an inmate who
has lived in the tents for 1 year. "It's inhumane."

Joe Arpaio, the tough-guy sheriff who created the tent city and long
ago started making his prisoners wear pink, and eat bologna sandwiches,
is not one bit sympathetic He said Wednesday that he told all of the
inmates: "It's 120 degrees in Iraq and our soldiers are living in tents
too, and they have to wear full battle gear, but they didn't commit any
crimes, so shut your damned mouths!"

Way to go, Sheriff! Maybe if all prisons were like this one there would
be a lot less crime and/or repeat offenders. Criminals should be
punished for their crimes - not live in luxury until it's time for
their parole, only to go out and commit another crime so they can get
back in to live on taxpayers money and enjoy things taxpayers can't
afford to have for themselves.

If you agree, pass this on. If not, just delete it.
Sheriff Joe was just reelected Sheriff in Maricopa County, Arizona
Post By (v)orpheus
Nov 21, 2006, 3:22pm

Happy Thanksgiving
DOT Announcement

I know, I know, I just wanted to spread the word to please, drive safely. Don't want to lose any of you guys either, as I am closer to each of you than I am to my parents (you all know "who" I am, for one.)
Post By (v)orpheus
Nov 20, 2006, 5:06pm

Something Different
Philosophy Lesson

The following is the philosophy of Charles Schultz, the creator of the "Peanuts" comic strip. You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just read the e-mail straight through, and you'll get the point.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America.

4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.

5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winner for best actor and actress.

6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners .

Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.

2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.

3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.

4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.

5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with .


The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They are the ones that care .

Pass this on to those people who have made a difference in your life??

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end tod ay. It's already tomorrow in Australia." (Charles Schultz)
Post By (v)orpheus
Nov 7, 2006, 12:57pm

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